Bummed About Diapers (PART ONE)

I have always (from as far back as I can consciously remember) wanted to be a mother. This sometimes subtle, sometimes over-powering, yet ever-present tugging at my uterine "heart-strings" has been a constant throughout my life. Every time I see a pudgy little bundle all swaddled in a mama's arms, or a tiny person waddling hand-in-hand with their daddy down a grocery isle, I say to myself, "Awww, a baby! I want one!" The desire to nurture is extremely strong in me. It's what led me, almost exactly one year ago, to scrap my career path in books/writing and instead try my hand at childcare, despite a complete lack of formal experience or education in the field (unless you consider playing house for far too long as a child and babysitting my nieces and nephews on occasion). I did however read several books of The Babysitter's Club series while I was in 5th grade, so perhaps that counts? Anyhow, with a supremely well-crafted and heart-felt cover letter (thanks to my BA in English) and an unflinchingly genuine desire to learn, I lucked out and was hired by a newly opened child care center in Southwest Portland. Working several months full time with a gaggle of infants from six weeks to eleven months gave me plenty of parenting practice under my belt! If you think one infant is a handful, try being responsible for the care of four of them at once.

"I bet it's good birth control," many people said.

Funny, and true, but the urge to parent is still there. I now am a nanny to a sweetie-pie 9-month-old, named Anna. I spend 20 plus hours of the week with her, one-on-one, doing all the things that a normal mother would do with their child - go for walks, take baths, sing songs, etc. and my baby "cravings" are still not satisfied. Of course, because she's not mine. Nonetheless, like many responsible someday-mothers and surely EVERY already-mother, I understand having a child makes a HUGE impact on your little world. My little world is not quite ready for me to be a mommy. Perhaps soon, but not yet. More accurately, mine and my husband's bank account is not ready. Babies are expensive. Of course, there are other factors that my husband and I would like to change before we deem ourselves ready. This is "family planning."

And just as important to consider in one's plans, the eco-responsible part of me knows that, aside from my own world getting bigger after having a child, the choices a parent makes while raising their beloved bambino can make a huge impact on the rest of the world, too, i.e. the environment. Yes, though their feet be itty bitty, the footprints they can leave on the environment are gigantuan. Ok, it's not their fault at all. Cower not, adorable little babes, you are not to blame! It's what your parents put on your bottoms!

I mean, I'm talking specifically about the excess waste and hazordous by-product from diapers. Disposable diapers, to be exact. Those squishy things on babies' bums to hold the poo and pee, the things that need constant changing, the ones that get thrown in the trash and then the landfill and then they sit and sit and sit and sit, bio-degrading in something like 800 years. Yeah, that's probably not good for the earth. Imagine the vast number of diapers that require changing in a single child's lifetime, assuming that they are not fully potty-trained until the age of three (which is quite common), and it's just appalling to think that all of that waste is just hanging around. Multiply that by, what, a really big number that represents the crap-ton of babies who exist in this world today alone, and you see that we've got a lot of stinky diapers on our hands. And I haven't even mentioned the trauma our earth undergoes when those plasticy bleached diapers are manufactured! Good grief! So these are things I worry about.

There is an option for those of us who are hip and green-minded. I've seen how some great Earth-friendly companies are now making bio-degradable disposables! WOW, what a relief! Except that they're pricey. If you so kindly will recall my earlier point that money is slim when you've got a child... And there's still a lot of waste involved in the process of manufacturing and disposing of them. Sure, it's trash that will eventually disappear, but it still is shitty (pun intended) to our earth.

I also haven't even begun to discuss the ramifications of those disposable diapers in terms of baby's health and development. Heard of diaper rash? Caused by diapers! There are a gazillion creams/pastes/ointments on the market devoted solely to the problem. No wonder! Our poor little kids are sitting in their own exrement and urine for sometimes hours on end, thanks to the constantly improving design of diaper linings that allow more and more of its contents to be absorbed. Obviously that's going to irritate their sensitive skin! And personally, I would hate to sit in my own pee or poo for even a minute, let alone several hours. Women can empathize to the smallest degree - you can understand what this must feel like if you have ever worn a maxi pad for menstruation. Unpleasant, to say the least. Additionally, by conditioning young babies to ignore the unpleasant sensation of a wet or soiled bottom until it is convenient for an adult to change their diaper, and then later turning around and asking for them to suddenly recall the sensation again as well as to give up what was once appropriate for elimination and adopt a completely new habit at the age of two or three (as in the process of potty training), you're just setting everyone up for a great deal of confusion and frustration. So I say, disposable diapers stink!

The alternative to disposable? Cloth. I've only ever heard rumors that these are still used by some parents, who are either ultra hippie or Quaker or something along those lines. I think the idea is great, in theory. Natural, easy-to-come by, responsibly produced cloth. Surely a cheaper choice and a more eco-friendly choice (if you're choosing organic, sustainably harvested fabric) as well. But I just assume that cloth diapers are such a pain in the rear to clean! You'd be doing laundry constantly, am I right? And there's some debate as to whether the extra energy and water required to launder cloth diapers is worth it compared to the environmental risks of disposables. Factor in the resources wasted by transporting the diapers if you use a cleaning service, and you realize you're still not helping the issue all that much. The enviro-impact is less, true, but how much less? I mean, it sounds worth it to me to put in the extra effort, but in the name of convenience, who knows what I'll resort to once I have a kid of my own.

So, what can a caring, conscientious, and frugal parent do about it?! It's something I've seriously mulled over. How will I diaper my baby?

In an effort to educate myself about the ever-changing market of baby stuff out there as well as the newest parenting techniques and philosophies, I peruse books and blogs and browse the shopping isles of baby departments or online stores. Ok, I do it just for fun too! Confession: Just last night I couldn't help but melt when I spotted a perfectly classic teak tandem swing online that I would die to buy for my children-to-be. I do this sort of thing all the time. So it's no surprise that while browsing the internet several weeks ago, I came upon an option I hadn't even considered: Diaper-free baby. "What? No diapers? Crazy talk!" you say. No really, it's possible! It doesn't really mean absolutely no diapers, ever. It only implies, a baby not dependent on diapers. Just here me out. This isn't some newfangled trend. This practice has been around for years! And most people are calling this approach Elimination Communication.

So why hadn't I heard about it, you might think?

(I'll tell you more about what I have learned regarding EC in my next post, so check back in a day or so!)

[photo borrowed from here]